Resisting the Urge to Cut
If you've been cutting and you want to stop, here are some approaches that might
help you.
For people who cut, doing something different may be a big change. Making this
change can take time because you are learning new ways of dealing with the things
that led you to cut. The tips you'll see below can get you started. But a therapist
or counselor can do more to help you heal old hurt and use your strengths to cope
with life's struggles.
Start by being aware of which situations are likely to trigger your urge
to cut. Make a commitment that this time you will not follow the urge, but
will do something else instead.
Then make a plan for what you will do instead of cutting when you feel
this urge.
Below are some tips you can try when you feel the urge to cut. We've put them into
several categories because different people cut for different reasons. So certain
techniques will work better for some people than others.
Look through all the tips and try the ones that you think might work for you. You
may need to experiment because not all of these ideas will work for everyone. For
example, some readers have told us that snapping a rubber band works for them as a
substitute for cutting but others say that the rubber band triggers an urge to snap
it too hard and they end up hurting themselves.
If one tip isn't right for you, that's OK. Use your creativity to find a better
idea. Or talk with your therapist to get other ideas on what could work for you. The
idea is to find a substitute for cutting — something that satisfies a need you
might feel without being as harmful as cutting.
You may also find that one of these ideas works for you sometimes but not always.
That's OK too. What a person needs can vary from time to time and from situation to
situation.
The techniques listed on the following pages will help you think about why you
might cut — as well as offer ideas on other things to do when you feel like
cutting. The more you learn about what's underneath your cutting behavior, the better
you will be able to understand and develop healthy ways to heal that pain.
Things to Distract You
Like all urges, the urge to cut will pass if you wait it out. Distracting yourself
with something else helps time go by and gets your mind off the urge to cut. The more
you wait out the urge without giving in, the more your urges will decrease over time.
Here are some things you can try while waiting for a cutting urge to pass:
- call a friend and talk about something completely different
- take a shower (make sure you don't have razors in the shower)
- go for a walk or run, take a bike ride, dance like crazy, or get some other form
of exercise
- play with a pet
- watch TV (change the channel if the show gets upsetting or features cutting)
- drink a glass of water
Things to Soothe and Calm You
Sometimes people cut because they're agitated or angry — even though they
may not recognize that feeling. If that's true for you, it can help to do something
calming when you feel the need to cut.
Even if you're not sure why you're cutting, it's worth giving these ideas a try:
- play with a pet
- take a shower (make sure you don't have razors in the shower)
- take a bath (make sure you don't have razors near the tub)
- listen to soothing music that will shift your mood
- try a breathing exercise
- try some relaxing yoga exercises
Things to Help You Express the Pain and Deep Emotion
Some people cut because the emotions that they feel seem way too powerful and painful
to handle. Often, it may be hard for them to recognize these emotions for what they
are — like anger, sadness, or other feelings. Here are some alternatives to
cutting that you can try:
- draw or scribble designs on paper using a red pen or paint on white paper —
if it helps, make the paint drip
- write out your hurt, anger, or pain using a pen and paper
- draw the pain
- compose songs or poetry to express what you're feeling
- listen to music that talks about how you feel
Things to Help Release Physical Tension and Distress
Sometimes, doing things that express anger or release tension can help a person
gradually move away from cutting. Try these ideas:
- go for a walk or run, ride a bike, dance like crazy, or get some other form of
exercise
- rip up some paper
- write out your hurt, anger, or pain using a pen and paper
- scribble on paper using a red pen
- squeeze, knead, or smoosh a stress ball, handful of clay, or Play-Doh
Things to Help You Feel Supported and Connected
If you cut because you feel alone, misunderstood, unloved, or disconnected, these
ideas may help:
- call a friend
- play with a pet
- make a cup of tea, some warm milk, or cocoa
- try some yoga exercises that help you feel grounded, such as triangle pose
- try a breathing exercise like the one in the button above
- curl up on your bed in a soft, cozy blanket
Substitutes for the Cutting Sensation
You'll notice that all the tips in the lists above have nothing to do with the
cutting sensation. When you have the idea to self-injure, start by trying the ideas
on those lists — such as making art, walking your dog, or going for run.
If they don't help, move on to the substitute behaviors shown below.
These substitute behaviors won't work for everyone. They also don't help people
get in touch with why they are cutting. What they do is provide immediate relief in
a way that doesn't involve cutting, and therefore holds less risk of harm.
- rub an ice cube on your skin instead of cutting it
- wear a rubber band around your wrist and snap it gently against your skin
- draw on the skin with a soft-tipped red pen in the place you might usually cut
You Can Do It
Cutting can be a difficult pattern to break. But it is possible.
If you want help overcoming a self-injury habit and you're having trouble finding
anything that works for you, talk with a therapist. Getting professional help to overcome
the problem doesn't mean that someone is weak or crazy. Therapists and counselors
are trained to help people discover inner strengths that help them heal. These inner
strengths can then be used to cope with life's problems in a healthy way.
