Talking to Kids About Alcohol
Preschoolers
Although 3- and 4-year-olds aren't ready to learn the facts about alcohol or other
drugs, they start to develop the decision-making and problem-solving skills they will
need later on. You can help them develop those skills in some simple ways.
For instance, let toddlers choose their own clothing and don't worry if the choices
don't match. This lets them know you think they're capable of making good decisions.
Assign simple tasks and let kids know what a big help they are.
And set a good example of the behavior that you want your kids to demonstrate.
This is especially true in the preschool years when kids tend to imitate adults' actions
as a way of learning. So, by being active, eating healthy, and drinking responsibly,
parents teach their kids important lessons early on.
Ages 4 to 7
Kids this age still think and learn mostly by experience and don't have a good
understanding of things that will happen in the future. So keep discussions about
alcohol in the present tense and relate them to things that kids know and understand.
For example, watching TV with your child can provide a chance to talk about advertising
messages. Ask about the ads you see and encourage kids to ask questions too.
Kids are interested in how their bodies work, so this is a good time to talk about
maintaining good health and avoiding substances that might harm the body. Talk about
how alcohol hurts a person's ability to see, hear, and walk without tripping; it alters
the way people feel; and it makes it hard to judge things like whether the water is
too deep or if there's a car coming too close. And it gives people bad breath and
a headache!
Ages 8 to 11
The later elementary school years are a crucial time in which you can influence
your child's decisions about alcohol use. Kids at this age tend to love to learn facts,
especially strange ones, and are eager to learn how things work and what sources of
information are available to them.
So it's a good time to openly discuss facts about alcohol: its long- and short-term
effects and consequences, its physical effects, and why it's especially dangerous
for growing bodies.
Kids also can be heavily influenced by friends now. Their interests may be determined
by what their peers think. So teach your child to say "no" to peer pressure, and discuss
the importance of thinking and acting as an individual.
Casual discussions about alcohol and friends can take place at the dinner table
as part of your normal conversation: "I've been reading about young kids using alcohol.
Do you ever hear about kids using alcohol or other drugs in your school?"
Ages 12 to 17
By the teen years, your kids should know the facts about alcohol and your attitudes
and beliefs about substance abuse. So use this time to reinforce what you've already
taught them and focus on keeping the lines of communication open.
Teens are more likely to engage in risky behaviors, and their increasing need for
independence may make them want to defy their parents' wishes or instructions. But
if you make your teen feel accepted and respected as an individual, you increase the
chances that your child will try to be open with you.
Kids want to be liked and accepted by their peers, and they need a certain degree
of privacy and trust. Avoid excessive preaching and threats, and instead, emphasize
your love and concern. Even when they're annoyed by parental interest and questions,
teens still recognize that it comes with the territory.