Kids Don't Cause Divorce!
People divorce for lots of different reasons. Usually, parents divorce when they have too many problems and they just can't seem to fix them, no matter how hard they try. Sometimes anger builds and parents fight a lot or say mean things to each other. Sometimes they stop talking to each other because they're mad at each other, and sometimes they meet someone else that they fall in love with and want to live with.
Adults have their own reasons for divorce. Whatever the reasons are, one thing is for sure: Kids don't cause divorce.
Still, many kids believe they're the reason their mom and dad got divorced. They think that if only they had behaved better, gotten better grades, or helped more around the house, the divorce wouldn't have happened. But this isn't true. Divorce is between moms and dads only!
Even if you once heard your parents argue about you, or your friend next door thinks his parents broke up because he got in trouble at school, these things don't cause a husband and wife to end their marriage.
You might feel you're to blame for your parents' divorce, but you are not the cause. And the fact that your parents decide not to stay married is not your fault.
Kids Can't Fix Divorce!
Just like the divorce is not a kid's fault, getting parents back together is not up to the kid, either. And most likely, this doesn't happen, although plenty of kids wish for it and even try things they think might work. Acting like an angel at home all the time (who can do that?) and doing really well at school may make your mom and dad happy, but it doesn't mean they'll get back together.
The opposite is also true. Getting in trouble so your mom and dad will have to get together to talk about these problems is not going to make the divorce go away either. So, just be yourself and try to talk through the feelings you have with a parent, another family member, friend, or teacher or counselor.
Date reviewed: January 2015